"Boundaries"

Boundaries: When to say yes, and when to say no to take control of your life by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend.

I don't like to do a lot of this but I'm going to quote some of the blurbs on the back of the book simply because they describe this book better than I can.

•  "Having clear boundaries is essential to a healthy balanced lifestyle. A boundary is a personal property line that marks those things for which we are responsible. Boundaries define who we are and who we are not."
• "Boundaries affect all areas of our lives: physical boundaries determine who may touch us, how and when; mental boundaries give us freedom to have our own thoughts and opinions; emotional boundaries help us deal with our own emotions and disengage us from the harmful, manipulative emotions of others; spiritual boundaries help us distinguish God's will from our own and give us renewed awe for our creator." 
• "Often Christians focus so on being loving and unselfish that they forget their own limitations. Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend offer biblically based insights into how to set healthy boundaries with our parents, spouses, children, friends, co-workers, and even ourselves."

The authours are clinical psychologists and directors of the Minirth Meir New Life Clinics in California. They are award winning authours, a speaking team, and co-hosts of a regular radio program, so they have the education and experience to be credible advisers on this vital and very personal topic.

I've read the book and am now working my way through a workbook that is available as well. You can still get a great deal from the book without doing the workbook so if your time is limited try that first. I find the workbook a little dry but I'm going to make myself complete it, mainly because this is an area of my emotional health that I've neglected and every relationship in my life has suffered as a result. But - it's never too late to change and I am determined to make this one, hopefully becoming more like the person I want to be in the process.

I don't think there's anybody who wouldn't benefit from reading this. It forces you to take a serious look at yourself and it makes you answer the hard questions - the ones we all avoid as much as possible. And yet it's not a heavy book or hard to read at all. It simply makes sense, and who couldn't use a little more sense in their life?

I absolutely recommend this one. If you do decide to read it, I'd love for you to come back and tell me a bit about your own experience with it. This is one of those few books that has made, and continues to make, an actual difference.